Tend & Keep Community Building · Lesson 3 of 6 · Making decisions together Course home
Community Building · Lesson 3 of 6

Making decisions together

Fair, clear ways to decide as a group
About 25 min to read5 partsVote simulator and decision mapHands-on practice

Every community makes hundreds of decisions a year, from accepting a new family to what color to paint the barn. How those decisions get made shapes everything: whether people feel heard, whether the work gets done, and whether neighbors still like each other afterward.

There's no perfect method. But some methods fit communities far better than others, and a few simple practices make almost any method work better. This lesson compares the main options and helps you design your own.

By the end of this lesson you will be able to
  1. 1Compare voting, consensus and consent decision-making.
  2. 2Explain how blocking can go wrong, and how communities fix it.
  3. 3Decide which decisions belong to the whole group, a circle or one person.
  4. 4Run a fair, focused community meeting.
  5. 5Write a clear proposal.
Part 1

Four ways to decide

Majority vote

More than half

Quick and familiar. But in a small community, the people who lose a vote are your neighbors, and repeated 6–5 votes can split a group into camps.

Supermajority

Two-thirds or three-quarters

Asks for broad support, so decisions have most of the group behind them. Often used as a fallback when other methods get stuck.

Consensus

Everyone agrees

The group works until everyone can support a proposal or stand aside. Done well, it builds deep trust. Done poorly, one person can stop anything.

Consent

No reasoned objections

Used in sociocracy. The question isn’t “do you love it?” but “can you live with it, and is it safe to try?” Objections must be explained, and they’re used to improve the proposal.

Sociocracy grew from the work of Dutch educator Kees Boeke, who used it in his school in the 1920s, and engineer Gerard Endenburg, who developed it into a full method in his company in the 1960s and 70s. As one saying puts it: "With consensus, I must convince you that I’m right. With consent, you ask whether you can live with the decision."

Part 2

When one person can stop everything

Many communities begin with consensus because it feels the most fair. But in its strictest form, consensus with unanimity, any single member can block any proposal, for any reason. Over years, that can turn into what some members call a "tyranny of the minority."

Earthaven Ecovillage, North Carolina

After 18 years of consensus with unanimity, Earthaven changed its rules in 2012. Now a block can be ruled invalid if 85% of members present disagree with it. Valid blockers meet with supporters to find a better proposal. If that fails, it takes two blocks, not one, to stop the original.

N Street Cohousing, Davis, California

Here, if you block, you have to help find a solution. Blockers organize up to six meetings over three months to write a new proposal together. If no agreement comes, the original proposal can pass with a 75% supermajority. Over 25 years, very few proposals were ever blocked.

Try it · same group, different rules

Does the proposal pass?

Set how each member feels about a proposal, like building a new chicken coop on shared land. See how the same feelings play out under five different decision rules.

The five-step scale is inspired by Sam Kaner’s “gradients of agreement.” In a simple vote, the first three count as yes.

Part 3

Who decides what

Not every decision needs the whole community. Ostrom's eighth principle from Lesson 1 says larger groups work best when smaller teams handle their own areas. Hand the small, everyday decisions to the people closest to the work, with a clear budget and a duty to report back, and save whole-group time for what really matters.

Circles that decide what’s theirs to decide.Land and watergardens, orchard, wellsCommon housekitchen, meals, guestsMembershipvisitors, new membersMoneybudget, dues, reservesWhole communityvision, big money,membership, agreementsEach double line is a leader and an elected representative, so news and concerns flow both ways.
A simple version of the circle structure used in sociocracy. Small groups can start with just the whole community and add circles as the work grows.
Try it · your own group

Your decision map

Who should decide each of these? Our suggestions are filled in. Change them to fit your group.

Adopting the vision and agreements
Accepting a new member
Buying more land or taking a loan
Setting the yearly budget and dues
Choosing what to plant in the shared garden
Planning the common house meal schedule
Fixing a leak in the water system
Spending up to $200 on garden tools
Hosting a guest for a weekend
Building a new chicken coop on shared land
Painting the common house a new color
Choosing the date of the harvest feast
Part 4

Meetings that work

Most communities meet once or twice a month. A good meeting has a written agenda shared ahead, clear roles, and a firm end time. A meal before or after makes everything easier.

PartTimeWhat happens
Opening round10 minEach person says one sentence: how they’re arriving today.
Reports10 minShort updates from each circle, written ahead when possible.
Proposals50 minOne or two proposals, each with time to clarify, react and decide.
Recap10 minRead back every decision: who does what, by when.
Closing round5 minOne word or sentence from each person on how it went.
Total85 minThen share a meal together.
Rotating roles
  • Facilitator: keeps the conversation fair and moving, and doesn’t push their own view
  • Timekeeper: watches the clock for each agenda item
  • Note-taker: writes down every decision, who does what and by when
  • Vibes-watcher: notices when people are tired, upset or left out, and calls a break
Speaking in rounds

For big questions, go around the circle and let each person speak once, without interruption, before open discussion. Quiet members get heard, and the loudest voices don’t take over. Use a talking piece if it helps, like a smooth stone or a pinecone from the land.

Part 5

Writing a good proposal

Most meeting trouble starts with a vague idea brought to the whole group. A short written proposal, sent out a few days ahead, lets people think it over and come with questions instead of surprises.

Every proposal includes
  • The problem or opportunity, in two sentences
  • What we propose to do
  • Who will do it, and by when
  • What it will cost, in money and time
  • How we’ll know if it’s working
  • When we’ll review it
An example

Problem: the hens are crowded and foxes have found the old coop.
Proposal: build a new coop for 20 hens beside the orchard.
Who and when: the land circle, before the first frost.
Cost: $900 from the land budget and three work days.
Success: no losses to predators this winter.
Review: at the spring meeting.

Hands-on practice · one meeting

Practice a group decision

Choose a real but low-stakes decision, like the date of a harvest feast or a new garden bed, and practice the whole process: proposal, rounds, a consent decision and a recap.

You'll need

  • A one-page written proposal, sent ahead
  • The agenda above
  • Volunteers for the four roles
  • A talking piece
  • Your decision map

Do it together

  1. Assign the roles for this meeting.
  2. Open with a round: one sentence each.
  3. Present the proposal, then a round of clarifying questions.
  4. Do a reaction round: what do you like, and what worries you?
  5. Improve the proposal together, then ask for objections.
  6. Decide by consent, and write down who does what by when.
  7. Close with a round: how did that process feel?
CHILDREN AND TEENS

Include the young

  • Let children take part in a decision that affects them, like a play area
  • Teens can take a role: timekeeper or note-taker
  • Practice a round at the family dinner table

Save the proposal, the meeting notes and your decision map for your progress record.

Closing

Every voice, and work that gets done

Good decision-making is a quiet kind of respect. It says each person's voice matters, and it trusts people to care for their part of the whole. Groups that practice it well often find their meetings become something they look forward to: a time to listen, to laugh, and to see the village take shape.

Next: the decisions with the highest stakes of all. How to own land together in a way that protects every family and the land itself.

Worksheet

Your Lesson 3 worksheet

Work through these together. Your answers save on this device as you type, and print cleanly for your records.

For your homeschool records

Progress record

What this lesson practices:

  • CivicsComparing systems of decision-making, majority rule and minority rights (NCSS theme 6; C3 D2.Civ.9).
  • MathFractions and percentages: majority, two-thirds and three-quarters thresholds.
  • English language artsCollaborative discussion and persuasive writing (Common Core SL.1, W.1).
  • Life skillsListening, cooperation and responsible decision-making (CASEL).

Standards mapping is a draft. If you use charter or ESA funds, confirm it with your education specialist.

Sources for this lesson